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NOBODY CARES
OCTOBER 28, 2025


Every artist should be excited by the beginning stages of their career. Not inhibited because of it, but rather strengthened by the lack of expectations from the general public. Space to tinker around with ideas, concepts and projects, without the weight of public criticism and feedback and projections. Now is not the time to be negative about all that you don’t have. Or where you think you should be. Or how come this person doesn’t think you are cool. Or how come you didn’t get accepted into this show or gallery…

You are not yet jaded by “it” because you have yet to truly experience it, only an idea of what you think it is. And you will never be right until it happens.

Because of my upbringing and proximity, it’s only natural it takes me longer. I only have my ideas so far, and it’s about figuring out how to make these ideas come to fruition. And in what way does making it happen, feel right. Everybody wants that instant gratification, instant recognition, instant approval from those you respect, and don’t get me wrong, so do I. But it’s just not gonna happen like that. Get that through your head. It won’t. Doesn’t mean it never will, but it certainly won’t right now. And unless you are a psychic, you have no idea when. Could be tomorrow, next month, a year, 10 years, the day before you die of old age, or even after death. That’s what is exciting and mysterious and scary and nauseating and horrifying.

And that’s what should drive you. It’s okay to want to be recognized right away, but right now that is a simple case of delusion. Nobody cares what you do, yet.

That’s very freeing!

***P.S. The only people that should be making you feel bad about being a nobody is your parents. They are scared you will fail, but that’s normal!!

*****P.P.S. It’s not nice your parents have no confidence in you, but that’s just how it is… My dad keeps asking me to go back to school and be a nurse incase this doesn’t work out for me. He constantly references this philosopher who said everyone should have two career paths in life. It is very annoying, but I also get it a little. And my dad is supportive of my ambitions, yet he still bothers me about nursing school… Not going to go, but yea… Normal stuff.




HOW TO DEAL WITH BURNOUT
JULY 25, 2025 



I’m currently in the throws of a deep burnout cycle. I CAN’T EVEN JOURNAL….. and I have been journaling every day nonstop for years now. Ha. For months I’ve been frustrated and upset with myself for being unable to recover, but today I realized that yes, I am burnt out, and noooo, I am not an imposter, I really am burnt out……!!!!

Like any physical illness, you just have to ride the wave and hope you can recover quickly. But like any illness, you can’t go on your own timeline of when you think you will get better. I do this thing that I’m sure other people do, where I don’t think I actually have the thing, it just so happens to describe what I have to a T, but I don’t actually have that.

Could and does go for most things. Mental health, physical health, etc. I constantly deny that I have these things because, well, I’m not really sure as to why ???? WHYYYY?????

But being burnt out affects your brain!! It’s not just lacking creativity, it literally impacts your memory, the lack of ability to compartmentalize your normal tasks without feeling incredibly overwhelmed, ups your stress, lowers your mood, everything. I feel like I am on autopilot right now, and no matter what i do, I cannot rid this feeling.

Feels like it’ll be this way forever. And I beat myself up every single day about it, but I’ve decided TODAY (yippeeeee!) that it’s gonna end when it is right to end. I have control issues, so of course i want to control when it’ll end, BUT I CANT! And neither can you, sadly.

It just is what it is for now. And if you keep stressing about it, it’ll prolong it even mooooore. Horrible, awful, troublesome… So what am i gonna do to facilitate the healing process?????? Try to stop beating myself up. Write a substack article, ha. Be a normal person who exists in a normal way. Carve out some time in the week to still do *some* creative things. Write for an hour, study a movie, read, what have you. It’s good to still have some structure. A reason to live, so on…..

I’m just as scared as you, and I don’t know when it’ll end. But if I can begin to enjoy other aspects of my life, it’ll come back to me. It’s not easy when you have to work to pay the bills, and feel an everlasting exhaustion just doing menial tasks, but that’s how life is and you don’t get the option to opt out of society… which is heartbreaking…

I can’t keep telling myself: I’m going to take a month off and I’ll be ME AGAIN! Because a month goes by and I’m still feeling the exact same. And then I beat myself up for still feeling the exact same. But the entire month I’m spiraling and hurting my brain trying to figure out why this is happening to my brain.

Believe it or not, you are SICK right now, as silly as that sounds… See, even now I don’t take it as seriously as any other kind of sickness… WHY?? BECAUSE IT’S NOT SHOWING UP PHYSICALLY??

HELP, I’M DEPRESSED….

OK…

Just relax and treat your brain and body right. Get on a schedule, enjoy the mornings, sleep a little earlier, eat enough food to fuel your brain and body. Sip green juices and stuff. BE NORMAL??

The brain is a complex organism, and we cant control when it wants to work in our favor.

It’s not the end of the world, it’s just what happens when you work too intensely and put too much stress and anxieties into something for a very long period of time.

I hate everything I have made thus far, ha. And I can’t even watch it. And I can’t think of anything new to write. And I can’t watch movies. And I can’t sit with my thoughts for longer than 30 minutes. It’s never been like this before (or maybe it has??? But I’ve forgotten??), but I am not lost forever and hopeless (please Allah let this be true…..) !!!!

I will return to normal!!!!!

One day I’ll come back to earth, and the next thing I create will be even better. But if I keep pushing myself and getting angry with myself, nothing will change. I am my own worst enemy, as I’m sure you are. 

Find ways to feel grounded again. LET GOOOOooooooo…
asreen is a filmmaker and playwright residing in new york city